Am I Making My Life Count?

What's up, guys? This is Ben from Provoke and Inspire. And at church yesterday, my pastor talked about the verse in James that describes our life like a mist. And I don't know about you, but this verse has always haunted me. He even made it more visceral by bringing up a spray bottle and spraying it into the air, demonstrating visually just how brief and fleeting a mist really is.

And the older I get, the more I realize that this is true. Our life is so brief, and it goes so fast. And a question that has been on my mind more and more as of late is the question, how do I not waste my life? Or maybe to frame it more positively, how can I make the most of my life? And that's what I wanna talk about today.

Now you may have noticed this sounds a little bit different. There's no David, Luke, or Chad, and that's because it's the summer. Now you may not be listening to this during the Northern Hemisphere summer, but that is when I'm recording this. And because we're part of this worldwide missions organization that reaches and disciples people all over the world called Steiger, the summer tends to be an even busier time for us. So we're scattered about the globe doing various things.

And so in light of that, I'm gonna hit you guys with this monologue based on the idea of how to make the most of my life. Now it doesn't matter who you are listening to this, what season of life you're in. I think we're all desperate to make our lives count. There's a movie that my parents well, specifically my dad had us watch a lot growing up, and it's called the Dead Poets Society. Now I'm sure you're familiar.

It's very, very famous. Believe it or not, this movie came out in 1989, which is insane, but it's an incredible, incredible movie. It stars Robin Williams as this eccentric, brilliant teacher who comes into this very strict private school, and he really leads these boys on a quest of challenging the status quo and making the most of their lives. And there's one scene in particular that has always haunted me, and he takes the boys out into the hallway and he has them stare at pictures of alumni of the past. And he says these very famous words.

I'm gonna go ahead and play a small audio clip of that for you, and I wanna talk about why this has haunted me so much and as followers of Jesus, what we can do about it. Gather ye rosebuds while ye may. The Latin term for that sentiment is carpe diem. Now who knows what that means? Carpe diem.

That's to seize the day. Very good, mister Meeks. Meeks. Another unusual name. Seize the day.

Gather ye roast bloods while ye may. Why does the writer use these lines? Because he's in a hurry. No. Ding.

Thanks for playing anyway. Because we are food for worms, lads. Because believe it or not, each and every one of us in this room is one day going to stop breathing, turn cold, and die. I'd like you to step forward over here and peruse some of the faces from the past. You've walked past them many times.

I don't think you've really looked at them. They're not that different from you, are they? Same haircuts, full of hormones just like you, invincible just like you feel. The world is their oyster. They believe they're destined for great things.

Just like many of you, their eyes are full of hope, just like you. Did they wait until it was too late to make from their lives even one iota of what they were capable? Because you see, gentlemen, these boys are now fertilizing daffodils. But if you listen real close, you can hear them whisper their legacy to you. Go on.

Lean in. Listen. You hear it? Arbeque. Carbeque.

Day, boys. Make your lives extraordinary. I think built within every human being is this desire to make the most of our lives. And I think you see this regardless of beliefs. Secular people feel this.

People of all kinds of religions feel this, and that's because that's not just something assigned to us or a social construct. I believe that's because it's how we are made. Part of being made in God's image is that he's put this desire inside of us to make the most of our lives. Steve Jobs, the famous founder of Apple, said that we were put here to make a dent in the universe. I don't know if that's the exact quote, but that's a paraphrase.

But the point is even a guy like Steve Jobs was built with this burning desire to make the most of his life. And scripture is filled with warnings against wasting our lives and encouragement to make the most of our time and talents. I look at Ephesians five fifteen and sixteen, and it says, so be careful how you live. Don't live like fools, but like those who are wise, make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. And there's so many other injunctions in scripture that we are to number our days and make the most of it and not waste it, be good stewards of our time and talent, not bury our treasures, etcetera, etcetera.

And so the crucial question in light of this is how do we make the most of this life that God has given us? And as I've been reflecting on it, the two word summary that comes to mind is live intentionally. Live intentionally. The fact is from the minute you are born to the minute you die, your life is in constant motion. It does not and it cannot stop until it's over.

It's moving and moving and moving. And an analogy that's really been coming to mind lately is how it feels when you're in a plane. Right? Because here you are sitting in this little metal tube or whatever it's made out of. And outside of you, you're going 600 miles an hour.

Right? You are just flying. But on the inside, you're just, like, eating from that little random tray they give you, and you're watching, like, Marvel or something. Right? You're watching a movie on this little screen oblivious to the chaos that is happening just inches to your right and maybe feet to your left.

Right? And so you are flying, but you kinda feel like things are just pretty chill and pretty still. And I think that's very analogous to our lives where things are moving and they're moving fast, but you don't really feel like it. Right? You're just kinda going about your day, and all of a sudden it's weeks and months and years and decades and boom.

Your life is in the rear view. And one day, like Robin Williams says, you'll be feeding daffodils. Your life will be over. It will just be a photograph for other people to look at. Now obviously, our hope does not lie in this life.

And again, it does bear asking, how does someone without a Judeo Christian perspective handle the brevity of life? I mean, it would be pretty overwhelming. You know, if we could actually feel what it feels like outside of the plane, so to speak, I think it would be too much. I don't think we could handle it. We'd be immobilized by the terror, the sheer terror of how fast and fleeting our lives really are.

And so I think in some ways, it's God's mercy that we don't fully feel that. But as followers of Jesus, we know we are called to make the most of our lives. So how do we do that? Back to that million dollar question, how do I make the most of my life? I feel like as I've been reflecting on this question, God has led me to a few key points that I hope as I express them with you, share them with you, you will find them beneficial and encouraging as well.

The first one is you've got to have a name. Many years ago, there was a self help motivational speaker, an entrepreneur, an author. His name was Jim Rohn, and he uttered these famous words. He said, if you don't design your own life plan, chances are you'll fall into somebody else's plan. And guess what they have planned for you?

Not much. Right? So he's expressing this idea that if you're not intentional, forces around you will simply pull you in and they will shape you, they will guide you, and they will send you down a path, and it's a path you likely don't wanna go down. Now from a Christian perspective, it actually is a lot worse than that. Right?

It's not just sort of neutral or you'll lack productivity or you'll just kind of do something someone else wants to do. As a follower of Jesus, we recognize that our natural drift, our proclivities, our motion is away from God and godliness and towards destruction. The apostle Paul describes it this way. He says in Romans twelve two, do not copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God's will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

In other translations, the process Paul is describing is is like this molding process where the world is trying to press you into its image. It is trying to pull you into its ways and down its paths, and that is the default setting. If we are not resisting, if we are not fighting against it, that is where we are going towards the world's ideas and the world's images, And that's pretty sobering. Right? If I'm not fighting it, the stream that I'm in is taking me away from discipline, away from selflessness, away from godliness, away from fruitfulness.

It's taking me in the opposite direction of all of those things. And so how do I stop that from happening? Well, what does Paul say? Paul says get your mind right. Get your thinking right.

And I think that means take ownership of your aim. Be intentional about what you're thinking, where you're going, and what you're doing. So where should I be going? What should I be doing? Well, one of the lies that the world wants to tell us is that you are what you do.

Right? That it's a meritocracy. So I am defined by my job, by my money, by my status, by my kids maybe, or the following I have or the image I have or whatever it is. Everything I am is wrapped up in what I do. That is one of the images, patterns of this world that is trying to impress itself upon you.

You are the things you do, so chase these things. If you are not successful, who are you? If you're not attractive, who are you? If you're not well followed, who are you? Right?

So it gets you to buy into this lie so that you chase after these things. But what's god's design for my life? Well, a fruitful life is defined by who you are, not what you do. Let me say that again. Contrary to the world's idea, a fruitful life is defined by who you are and not what you do.

It says in John fifteen five, I am the vine. You are the branches. Those that remain in me and I in them will produce much fruit, for apart from me, you can do nothing. You are a branch. That is what you are.

So what you do is an extension of who you are. Your identity shapes your behavior. It shapes what you invest in and where you go. And so because you're a branch, that defines what you should be doing. That defines your aims.

What is the aim of a branch? It's to remain. That's what it is. Your aim is to remain. That rhymes.

That's a little cheesy, but I think you get the point. Now if you do a word study on remain, what does it mean? Well, it means to stay, to abide, to dwell. It signifies a continuous and ongoing connection with something or someone and in this case, with Jesus. That is your aim.

That is your number one top of the list aim, to foster a continuous and ongoing connection with Jesus. And when I really understood this, it changed my life. There was a period in my life where things were pretty rough. I had gone from living in New Zealand as a teenager, having a very established identity, established social life, really a sense of who I was and where I belonged, and I moved from New Zealand to The US. And this was pretty jarring to say the least.

This would be the third time now I had moved continents and had to essentially start over socially, and things just didn't work out as planned. I found myself in a pretty lonely, confused spot trying to figure out who I was, not really finding good friends or understanding where I belonged, and it was pretty tough. And I remember the weekend, and I didn't have much to do, and I was feeling particularly lonely. And I remember going on this path right outside of the apartment where I was staying, and there was this small man made pond, and I would walk circles around it. And I remember just being frustrated and crying out to God and asking him why I had been put in this place, why I had been put in this spot, and I kinda reached a breaking point.

And I remember just saying, okay, God. Like, I'm done. I'm done trying to find my identity in this or that, and how I view myself, and the friends that I have or do not have, or how accomplished or successful I feel. I give up. I just want you.

If all I got is you, then that'll have to be enough. And so I started to build my life on that. I started to learn what it meant to be a branch. And hour after hour, I would walk on this little man made path right outside of my apartment. People probably thought I was crazy, but I would seek God.

I was starting to develop this continuous and ongoing connection with Jesus, and it revolutionized my life. From there, I really believe God started to help me calibrate my life and to put into order my aim and to give me a real clear direction and focus. But it started with this revelation of who I was, and from there, it informed what my priorities were, what my foundation truly was. Now as I've grown and as the seasons of my life have changed, as I've gotten married and had kids, I have committed to creating a mission statement for my life. And I think once we establish this foundation of seeking God, of knowing him, from there, I believe God would really want to help us articulate a clear aim for our lives.

And it changes and it evolves given the season that you're in, but I believe it needs to be specific enough to aim at, but general enough to not get caught in the weeds. And so for me, this is my current life mission statement. I want to have an intimate relationship with Jesus. That is the top of the list. After that, I wanna be a devoted world class husband.

I want to cultivate intimacy with my wife. I wanna be a devoted world class dad. I wanna have a real and genuine intentional relationship with my kids and show and teach them what they need to know. And then I wanna tell people about Jesus, and I wanna inspire others to do the same. That is my life's mission statement in that order.

Top down. It's not horizontal or evenly distributed. It's in that order. And, honestly, these are my eulogy goals. These are the kinds of things I know at the end of my life I want people to say about me.

Right? When it's all done and people are at my funeral, which is a crazy thing to think about, I know they're not gonna be talking about the podcast I recorded or the shows that I made or the books that I wrote or whatever. They're not gonna talk about these things. My hope and my belief is that they're gonna talk about my love for Jesus, that imperfect as I was, I was committed to seeking and knowing God. I hope they're gonna talk about my commitment to my wife, how I was a dedicated servant hearted husband, that I loved my wife well.

I hope they're gonna talk about how much I loved my kids, how intense and ferocious my love for them was, and how committed I was to them as a dad. And then I want them to say that, man, he gave his life to tell people about Jesus and inspire others to do the same. This is the kind of life I know I will have no regrets about. I can know that this is an aim I can be proud of and pleased in. So the question is, do you have a mission statement for your life?

Do you have a mission statement for your life? Because if you don't, you will not go where you wanna go. You will be pressed upon by forces outside of your control. Somebody else will make a plan for you. And as I've already said, it will not be a direction you will wanna go in.

The natural proclivity of the human heart is not towards the things that matter, but away from godliness, fruitfulness, and a life you will be proud of. So if you wanna make the most of your life, you have to have an aim. After that, you have to have a plan. And that can sound like the same thing, but to me, this is really where the rubber meets the road. This is where things get very, very specific.

To me, an aim is the big picture, the 10,000 foot view, the main pillars of your eulogy goals. But a plan is where things actually get down to the details. It's how you're actually going to reach your aim. The number one reason why people are distracted, they fail to accomplish what they set out to do, they drift, they stagnate is because they don't have a plan. For example, you can say, okay.

I want to make knowing God my number one priority. That's the pillar. That is the foundation of my aim. But to that, I would ask, okay. When?

Where? In what way? Using what approach? What barriers do you anticipate that you'll have to overcome to accomplish that? Who's going to keep you accountable?

Unless we get down to this level of detail, our aims will never become plans, and we will never get to where we want to go. Let me run you through a personal example of what I'm talking about. So because of the season of life that I'm in with three kids and just the chaos of it all, in order to have a consistent time to seek God, I have to wake up at 04:45AM. Now it's not necessarily what I wanna do, but it's what I've learned I have to do. And so even that, even identifying that is part of the plan.

It's taking my aim of wanting to cultivate an ongoing and continuous connection with Jesus and drilling it down to a specific time within the context of the season I'm in where it will actually happen. Now what does that mean for you? Given the season that you're in, given the things that you are committed to, what would it look like to find the optimal time to seek God in your life? When is that? When is that one moment that is consistent and uninterrupted?

Now for me, it has to go further than just the time. Because, say, I pick 04:45 like I have. Okay. Great. So I, you know, set my alarm.

That would obviously be step one in terms of the plan, and my alarm goes off. But I haven't told myself, Ben, do not snooze. You've gotta do this. If this is gonna work, even those five to ten minutes really, really matter. So I have to tell myself the night before, wake up that first time.

Now full disclosure, as I walk you through all these details, I'm very human and I fail a lot. So these are definitely ideals that I strive to meet, but that doesn't necessarily there's no grace or there's no imperfection in this process. But I commit to not snoozing. Then beyond that, let's say, okay. I get up and I walk to my kitchen and, well, there's no coffee.

Well, that's it. That's game over. I'm not gonna do anything. Right? I did not realize, okay.

I'm gonna have to set that coffee pot the night before. I'm gonna have to use the program feature to make sure it's ready when I wake up. But it gets even more detailed than that because I can have a plan because I can wake up when my alarm has me wake up, I can have the coffee ready. But if I stumble a little dazed, a little confused into my living room, but I don't have a plan in terms of what I'm gonna do, do I need my Bible? Do I need a notebook?

What am I gonna study? What passage am I gonna study? How am I gonna pray? What is my approach? You see, this level of detail is required because if I wake up and I stumble into the living room and I don't have a plan, I'm gonna spend half my time just thinking about what I need and what I wanna do.

And by the time I look up, it's too late. My kids are awake, and the opportunity is gone. So when it comes to making a plan, it's getting this granular, this specific. Okay. I wanna be a good husband.

So what does that mean? How does that need to be reflected in my calendar, in my bank account? How do I have to prioritize my time so that actually is happening? It's not enough to have lofty aims. If we don't have specific plans, they will never happen.

So you gotta have an aim. You gotta have a plan. And then third, you have to build in rhythms of reflection, reconfiguration, and recommitment. I'm terrible, and I would say, in general, our modern culture is terrible at reflection, at celebration. We are always moving on to what's next.

We are never stopping to think, what am I actually doing and how is it actually going? But the sad thing is without contemplation and self reflection, we will not grow. In fact, so much of the study on learning has revealed that learning does not necessarily happen by doing or succeeding or failing. Learning happens when we reflect on our successes and failures. When we take the time to analyze what we've done and say, how did it go?

What worked? What didn't? As followers of Jesus, self reflection is critical. But I would add that it's not just about me analyzing me. I know at this point, this can all sound very self help y and life hack and it sound very human, but that's not what I'm saying.

To me, this is about inviting the holy spirit to examine me and to bring to mind ways in which I need to adjust. Like it says in Psalm hundred thirty nine twenty three, search me, oh god, and know my heart. Test me and know my anxious thoughts. It's about inviting god into my life and saying, okay. With your help, I believe this is what I have aimed to do, and these are the plans that I've made to reach those aims.

Now how is it actually working? Is it actually happening? Are my disciplines, my finances, my calendar, are these things actually reflecting my plans that are trying to reach my aims or not? And the fact is, and I know you know this, it's easy to drift. Right?

You know this. Life changes and seasons change and capacities change. And so we have to continually reflect on our plans to see if they are aligning with our aims to know if we're actually going where we want to go. Specifically, this is what reflect, reorganize, and recommitting looks like. First, you put your aim front and center.

You say to yourself, this is where I'm actually intending on going, and you remind yourself of it. Maybe you rewrite it down. Maybe you put it on a whiteboard. Whatever you gotta do, you put your aim back, front, and center. Then two, you evaluate whether the plan you've made is actually working.

Am I actually are the rhythms and disciplines I've set up actually working? If I tell myself 6AM is a great time to seek God, but my kids are always waking up at 06:15 or I'm staying up too late, so I'm never getting up in time, whatever it might be, you analyze the details of your plan. You align them with reality, and you you look to see if they're actually accomplishing what you intended to accomplish. The third thing you do is you reconfigure the plan. If it's not working, make it work.

Choose a different time. Choose a different approach. Find some accountability. Do little things to make it more helpful. Set that coffee pot.

Put the shoes out. Come up with a plan. Have the pen ready. Whatever you gotta do, make the plan work for you. And then finally, you recommit to the original aim and the renewed plan to get there.

You say to yourself, okay. These are the adjustments I've made. I've reminded myself of my aim. I'm ready to go. Let's go.

The fact is we have to build in rhythms to reflect, to reorganize, and recommit. In my life, I call this Friday reset, and I take about an hour and a half every Friday, and this is exactly what I do. I put my aim front and center. I evaluate my plan. I reconfigure the plan, and then I recommit.

I personally think weekly is about right. I think if it was every day, it'd be overwhelming. It's too myopic. I think if it's every month or even six months, it's too late. Right?

You can have these aims and you look up and you're like, I don't really do any of that, but then you kinda put it off till the next six months. So for me, and it can be different for you, but for me, it's about every week, and I find this is a very healthy spiritual rhythm of being intentional so that I make the most of the life I know God wants me to live. Just wrapping up here, in Matthew 25, Jesus tells this story of three servants, and two out of the three of them invest what they've been given really well, and they produce a great return. But one of the three doesn't. He simply buries what he's given, and the master is very upset with him.

The fact is every person listening to this, including me, has been given so much. The fact is if you are listening to this on an iPhone or an equivalent smartphone or a computer, if you're listening through AirPods, if you drove in your car today, if you slept in a bed, you are among the most elite people that have ever lived. You are the rich person. You know, sometimes we hear this idea that too much is given, much is expected, and we always look to the richer person or the more privileged person to our left. You are the person to whom much is given.

That is just simply the fact. What are you going to do with all that God has given you? Are you going to make the most of your life? Because like Robin Williams in Dead Poets Society warns these boys and he's warning you and I, one day you'll be feeding daffodils. Are you seizing the day?

Or maybe like James warns us, your life is but a mist. It's here today. It's gone tomorrow. It is so precious. Don't waste it.

Have an aim. Ask God to give you an aim. And from that aim, build out this mission statement for your life. Get detailed and with the power of the Holy Spirit, have a plan. Look at your bank account.

Look at your calendar. Make sure that your plan is actually getting you to your aim. And then build in seasons of reflection. Build in seasons of intentional surrender to the Holy Spirit, and say, am I doing what you want me to do? In the end of the day, this isn't some formula or self help hack, but I believe these are godly principles that will help you fulfill your god given instincts to make the most of your life.

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